Every October teaches me how to let go. This year, it’s fear I’m shedding — fear of not being enough, of being judged, of wanting too much. Because joy, I’m learning, doesn’t come from certainty. It comes from trying.

Some wounds take decades to surface. For me, it was a single moment in middle school — a cruel comment that left a crack in my creative self-worth. Twenty years later, while working through The Artist’s Way, I realized how deeply that memory still shapes my fear of being “too much.” This essay explores the messy middle of healing: belonging, validation, and what it means to finally offer my 12-year-old self the safety she deserved.